Sunday, October 5, 2014
Grumpy. That's the word that describes my past 12 months. I know everyone told me life would only get worse from now on, but not even I could be prepared for what real life really means. I have a lot of disappointments about how things can turn out or how people can really be. I suppose I just need to remember that while I may not have everything perfectly how I want it, I still have got some good things and should be appreciative of those things. I am thankful everyday for my beautiful dog and my loving boyfriend. I should be thankful that I have a job and I should be thankful that I have a place to live, but I have little reservations about those things that should drive me to keep trying for something better.
There was once a time when I thought I had fallen in love with someone. I was head over heels and couldn't keep myself away from him. I followed him around like a shadow and did everything I could to get his attention. I eventually got tired of waiting for him to notice me instead of the other girls, so I grieved the failure and moved on. This was his queue to realize what opportunity he had let slip away. He in turn began to pursue me, but I refused to let him bring me back into the past. At least that's what I tried to do. The moment you let your gaurd down, they take and take.