So I've come upon something that I need to announce to all my friends, and I figure a blog post might be an appropriate medium.
My boyfriend and I have been dating for over a month now. We're still a new-ish couple, so there are things that are not part of our repitoire of actions. We are also not a completely conventional couple, so yes, some of these common couple 'rights' are not going to be part of our relationship ever. A particular range of abilities that I have chosen to not take part in include the following: nagging, hovering, controlling, mothering, smothering, stalking, inappropriate PDA, mooching, and squatting. For some reason, many of my friends have assumed that because I am his girlfriend I will always know where he's at or what he's doing 24/7. I do not know where he is all the time, nor do I care enough to know. If you are a friend that assumes I know where my boyfriend is 24/7 you can stop assuming that right now. You may ask me if he went to class today, and my answer is 'dunno' because its true. If he wants to skip every damn class and just sit at home like a bump on a log, fine. I mean, that sucks for him because that won't work for long... but if that's how it is, so be it. I'm not his conjoined twin, I'm his girlfriend. I also do not text or call him every few minutes to say 'where are you?' or 'just thinking about you.' Not only is it completely silly but there is a level of pointlessness to it, he is terrible at responding to messages (something I can relate to). No, I cannot help you get a hold of him. What should I do for you? Pull up his coordinates on a GPS from that tracking chip I put in him? You=crazy. I don't nag. I don't give a flying rat's ass if my boyfriend has the dirtiest home in this entire college town. As long as his mess stays off my stuff, I couldn't care less. So you don't need to complain to me about his living habits in the hopes that I will be able to change him. If he borrowed your stuff and you want it back, I don't know why you're asking me about it. Take your problems to him directly, it might be more effective. A home is a sacred place, sure, but sometimes getting lost in a mess can be comforting. Hell, you should see my house around finals week, a health inspector would have cardiac arrest on the spot.
There are certain things I want my boyfriend to reciprocate, and he does. I don't want: nagging, hovering, mooching, or squatting. These things include knowing where I'm at and who I'm with 24/7. If I don't want it done to me, I choose not to do it to him. He's a big boy, he can do things on his own without my constant pushing and heckling. My boyfriend fills certain desires for me and those desires do not include the duties of a maid service, page boy, secretary, or servant. If you believe him to be one of those things for you, by all means nag the crap out of him; I strongly believe he has never taken up any of these positions with anyone other than his mother.
Now that you may understand these things a little better, you can respect my relationship more effectively. Also, I'm sorry if this upsets you because I'm not talking to you personally, its just that a lot of people have been bugging me about the things my boyfriend does. Hopefully this may help deter any future misunderstandings.
Sunday, March 11, 2012
I want to take a little time to give a shout out to my sweetheart of a boyfriend, who even in the throws of a drunken tantrum, he can still take a moment to give me a kiss and tell me how much he cares about me. I think that is really cool and I think that shows how much I mean to him on a deep level. I'm always on edge when it comes to saying the right thing at the right time. I just want to make sure I don't throw "Love" out there at an inappropriate moment, or even worse, when the feeling is not reciprocated. Moments like that can be either very bonding or very awkward. I try to avoid the awkwardness. Thankfully, my boyfriend was able to crash through the awkward barrier for us both. Now if you're a person who knows us both, you may be thinking of a question along the lines of "Now these two started dating a little under a month ago... is it normal to be talking about 'love'?" My answer to you is simple, there are things here that are a long-time brewing over the past several months if not longer. Don't worry, I'm not too crazy here. I have an appreciation for letting our feelings marinate before serving them for dinner, if you know what I mean. I certainly do not have any history in matters of deep infatuation, so I am being very cautious currently.